Yankee Spanking Time

10 06 2010

In a break from the fashionable negativity usually deployed on this blog, today we’ve gone all patriotic on you. Maybe we’ve just been beaten down, or maybe we couldn’t find any other nationalities within our family bloodlines – either way, nice and positive for a change.

The Royal Bafokeng Stadium, Rustenberg

Our England team to face the USA – Saturday 12th June, 7.30pm.

Joe Hart – While abuse has rained in over our continual backing of the Man City stopper, it’s obvious that Fabio Capello’s fear of change is Hart’s only obstacle in his pursuit of the number 1 shirt. Technically excellent, secure hands, and a high level of confidence are all essential ingredients in the make-up of an international goalkeeper – Hart is set-apart from his rivals in possessing all three.

Glen Johnson – If Gary Neville had been included in the squad, the world would seem a happier place. When England encounter decent opposition in the latter stages, the likes of Di-Maria, Nilmar, and Robben will most likely highlight this error mercilessly.

Ledley King – Phenomenal player, creaking athlete. Nobody should lose sleep over his level of desire, but time and injury have robbed him of the electric recovery pace which made him such a formidable opponent in the earlier stages of his career.

John Terry – Suspect personality aside, he’s clearly willing to run through the clichéd brick wall for his country. Has anchored the defence of a premier European club side for the best part of a decade now, nothing lurks around the corner that he hasn’t seen before.

Ashley Cole – World Class in every aspect of his game. Is also the only left-back in South Africa that need not fear Lionel Messi. It’s not a coincidence that the Argentinian has consistently been anonymous against Chelsea in the Champions League., Will have landon Donovan in his pocket throughout.

Aaron Lennon – If he produces the pre-Christmas form he showed for Spurs, he could be one of the most destructive players in the tournament. The main question mark, as ever with Lennon, will be his delivery once he beats his man. Possibly key to England success on Saturday night, and should roast Jonathon Spector time and time again.

Frank Lampard –
The last chance for him to leave a mark on the global game. The media will focus on Wayne Rooney, but an in-form Lampard could be just as much of an asset. Worrying penalty form will hopefully rectify itself, and he remains lethal from inside 35 yards.

Steven Gerrard – His credentials as captain are suspect, but still completes an embarrassment of riches in centre-midfield. Hopefully the rumoured press-injuction can be maintained until after the tournament.

Joe Cole – Something of a renaissance man in the England squad. Rather than playing his way into contention, Cole has benefitted more than anyone else from the reshuffle that followed the injury to Gareth Barry. Of all the England players, probably the most technically complete and continentally influenced. This will be his third World Cup, so can be trusted where Milner and Wright-Phillips might be too much of a risk.

Wayne Rooney –
Will be unplayable for the US. Rooney’s power, pace, technique, flair and creativity will be fair too potent for a defensive pairing that includes the hapless Jay DeMerit…yes, the one that plays for Watford.

Peter Crouch – Whether scoring regularly or not, he continually troubles the very best the Premier League has to offer – furthermore, he’s not the kind of player who can be negated by ‘heroically’ throwing bodies in front of the ball. Factor in Tim Howard’s less than convincing history under a high-ball and you can guess the rest.

Official news, media hysteria, and The Sun being all ‘IN-GER-LAND’ – all here….

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